• The Great Mouse Detective

    The Great Mouse Detective

    ★★★½

    can i use the “gay rat” tag if ratigan continuously insists he’s a mouse? gonna do it no matter what but thought i’d be polite and ask first

  • Smooth Talk

    Smooth Talk

    ★★★★

    flirting with disaster and getting away with it. looking for trouble and screaming when you find it. the endemically teenage desire to die for just a little bit of attention.

    Smooth Talk hasn't left my mind since i watched it. laura dern has always been a superstar. at work yesterday, i found a joyce carol oates collection and read the short story it was based off of (Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?) on my 15-minute break. i…

  • Stargirl

    Stargirl

    ★★

    in Stargirl, 16-year-old protagonist leo’s birthday is a major plot point. he receives a porcupine necktie every year from a mysterious benefactor. he is sad that his mom is working and cannot be home to celebrate. he is thrilled when manic pixie Stargirl surprises him at school with a ukelele serenade of Happy Birthday. 

    the next day, leo receives a text and we see the date on his phone: September 12th. as leo’s birthday was the day before, this means…

  • The Muppet Movie

    The Muppet Movie

    ★★★★

    need to smoke a blunt with janice

  • Dinner with Friends

    Dinner with Friends

    ★★★

    toni collette, greg kinnear, andi macdowell, and dennis quaid in a movie directed by norman jewison and shot by ROGER DEAKINS? AND it’s based off of one of those plays that are entirely about two sets of couples fighting in various locations around the house?????

    of COURSE the girls and i loved this in spite of its flaws of COURSE we gasped and cheered and cackled through the entire 94-minute runtime of COURSE there’s a classic scene of toni freaking out at the family dinner table

  • Ruby Sparks

    Ruby Sparks

    ★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    clever premise that wusses out with a 500 Days of Summer-esque ending but wilds out with the casting of annette bening and antonio banderas as the parents of paul dano and ❤️🇮🇹chris messina🇮🇹❤️

    in zoe kazan’s own words, the film is meant to challenge and subvert the gaze (noble goal!), and maybe her original screenplay did, but the end product materializes as toothless. we never get to see ruby as a real person, nor her life outside of calvin, and i’m…

  • The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
  • Slaying the Dragon

    Slaying the Dragon

    hard to rate this, as it’s a 58-minute made-for-PBS special, but it’s the only documentary i could find about the history and impact of cinema’s dehumanizing stereotypes of asian and asian-american women. through archival footage of old films and interviews with pioneering asian actresses and other experts, our on-screen legacy is examined through a different, fresher lens (the doc is directed by chinese-american Deborah Gee and funded by Asian Women United). 

    we are told to be quiet, docile, submissive, passive;…

  • Chicago

    Chicago

    ★★★★★

    unironically would like “OK YOU BABES OF JAZZ, LET’S PICK UP THE PACE! LET’S MAKE THE PARTIES LONGER, LET’S MAKE THE SKIRTS SHORTER — LET’S ALL GO TO HELL IN A FAST CAR AND KEEP IT HOT!” to be engraved on my future memorial bench (oh yeah btw i’m gonna do enough cool stuff to get a memorial bench). if it won’t fit/is too expensive then i’ll settle for just that last sentence. but please try really hard to get the whole thing

  • Lara Croft: Tomb Raider

    Lara Croft: Tomb Raider

    ★★★

    was trying to decide what to watch for international women’s day and my boy roommate jokingly suggested tomb raider, unaware i own the blu-ray ($2.99 at amoeba music) and live my life as a lara croft apologist. then my other boy roommate stood up to turn off the lights so my girl roommate and i didn’t have to move from the couch. allyship is awesome :) and so is this silly little movie that haters take too seriously! lara BEEN croft

  • Opening Night

    Opening Night

    ★★★★★

    the hybridization of written word and improvisation evokes the truest emotions. it's the antithesis of an algorithm. yes, you can predict that myrtle will drink a lot and freak out, but it's impossible to know what she'll say, how she'll behave. she's alienating and selfish and frustrating, and best of all, she's real. an empathetic, not sympathetic, portrait of an aging woman rebelling against the two roles actresses are allowed to play: sexy or matronly. it's a false dichotomy, and…

  • The Princess Diaries

    The Princess Diaries

    ★★★½

    rewatching as an adult means noticing that mia has an elliott smith poster on her bedroom wall ... if that’s who she’s listening to on the poster then i hope she’s okay <3